I have so much to do and accomplish. I’ve done an incredible amount of work this summer on myself, and I think it has been valuable, productive work.
But I felt guilty. Did my husband have to die for me to realize all this potential? Am I using his death to serve me? Is that wrong?
I realized that he taught me incredible lessons about life that I can take forward. He may have completed suicide, but really, that was a single moment in time and doesn’t erase an entire era of living according to his values that I can keep close as I grab ahold of everything that is new again.
These values include:
- Preserving working class values and addressing income inequality
- Commitment to education and ongoing learning
- Questioning authority, finding independent validation
- Appreciating and protecting nature
- Doing the right thing, even if it was against rules or guidelines
- Seeking help when you need it
- Travel, exploration
- Voting, active participation in the political process, local organization and engagement
- Being neighborly, helping each other out
- Creating and maintaining distance from toxic relationships
- Financial planning and financial responsibility
- Following through, keeping your word
- Investing in relationships, putting in the time and work necessary
- Health and fitness
- Animal rights, loving and valuing and respecting them
- Sustainability in everyday practice/ life
Despite his death, he lived his values every day. Those who knew him know this is true. I don’t need to feel guilty about moving on and loving my life, if I keep the values close.